Plastics continue worrying trend of losing cricket matches in the vicinity of Alexandra Palace26/7/2018 What’s the plural of octopus? It’s a question that lexicographers have long since wrestled with: ‘octopi’, ‘octopuses’, and even ‘octopodes’ form the three alternatives, with each claiming superiority through an etymology in either ancient Greek or Latin. It was therefore with great enthusiasm that the Plastics XI travelled en masse (apart from Peter) this past Sunday to a field which lay in the shadow of Alexandra Palace to face Octopus CC - and more importantly, to find some answers. This was to be Leo’s final game for the Plastics before moving away, and so with great reluctance Charlie was persuaded to hand over the captaincy reigns, for this match at least. This decision proved to be an instant success as Leo won the toss and chose to bowl, meaning that by a shockingly prompt 1:30pm, the game was underway, with Jerry and Simon opening the bowling. Despite bowling some troubling lines and awkward lengths (sometimes even at the same time), the two Octopus openers took their team to 50/0 by the 10th over - the Plastics were desperate for a wicket, and so threw the ball to the man with the golden arm, Jamie Doy. He did not disappoint. On the 6th ball of the 10th over, Jamie struck: The batsman mistiming it to Alex at cover, for his 5th consecutive catch for the Plastics. Matt soon joined Jamie, inducing not one but two nicks in his first over which sailed tantalisingly between slip and keeper, making him very cross. This anger fuelled much of his first bowling spell; his first four overs comprising almost exclusively of either complete whiffs from the batsmen, or sixes struck by the remaining opener who had by now very much got his eye in. Undeterred (and perhaps even angrier), he produced an absolute thunderball to clip the top of off stump and dismiss the Octopus no. 3, leaving Octopus CC 114/2 by the end of their 15th over. On then came Maithri and Pete Bish, with the latter determined to shake off any suggestion of being nicknamed Dr. No-Ball after an uncharacteristically varied performance against Cumnor Challengers. This he did with aplomb, bowling a tight first two overs and claiming the scalp of the Octopus no. 4 with the help of a particularly safe catch from Robert (a highpoint in Bishop/Bishop relations for the day – more on this later). It was here that the game settled into a rhythm that would last until the 29th over, with some canny captaincy on Leo’s behalf depriving the remaining opener of much of the strike. Come the 29th over, the scene was set with Octopus batsman no. 1 on 97*, Simon bowling, and the field spread. A lofted cover drive appeared at first to be going straight to Alex who was positioned on the boundary, however it soon became apparent that the ball was dropping rather quickly and was going to land short. Despite Alex’s best efforts the ball narrowly evaded his hands as he was running in from the boundary, and crossed the rope, bringing up the batsman’s century in bittersweet fashion. Alex shouldn’t feel bad; he had a license to spill after his incredible recent catching record for the Plastics, and indeed all was not lost as Simon got his man 2 balls later. The rest of the innings was well contained by the Plastics: Jamie and Pete collecting an extra wicket each, meaning that the Plastics were set a target of 255 to chase in 35 overs – a hefty total, but not far beyond par, it was thought. Tea first though, which was a cracker, as particularly noted by an unnamed Plastics batsman who took the liberty of starting post-match drinks at the half way mark, courtesy of the pavilion bar. Leo and Charlie were the two Plastics given the unenviable job of opening the batting, and they made their way out to the middle knowing that they had a mammoth task on their shoulders. That undertaking did not get any easier when the Octopus opening bowler was revealed to be a left arm inswinger who could straighten the ball prodigiously. Leo was rapped on the pads early and devastatingly given out by the umpire: it was not the way his testimonial deserved to be ended, but it represented just the start of the Plastic’s batting woes. Robert and Charlie both looked to have made solid starts before getting out in increasingly unfortunate circumstances, with Robert mistiming one to cover, and Charlie dragging one on off the inswinger. Maithri uncharacteristically followed suit, and the spectre of the Plastics’s lowest ever score of 52 all out was very much at the forefront of everyone’s minds as the scoreboard displayed 23-4 after 9 overs. Alex was now at the crease however, and he made his intentions to hit the living daylights out of most of the balls coming his way very clear from the off. The Alex/Pete Bish partnership was responsible for adding a quickfire 20 runs to the total before Pete was dramatically ruled LBW by his brother. As you may have guessed by now, this represented the lowpoint in the Bishop/Bishop saga, with Pete adamant that the ball was going over the top, and Robert adamant that Pete shall respect the umpire’s authority and get off the pitch. Peter then joined Alex at the crease and the pair enjoyed almost five overs together before Alex found himself cruelly caught on 35, just when the century was starting to come into view. His strike rate was a lofty 152.17; a number to be remembered when Peter’s is revealed lower down. Jerry then took his turn at the crease, and together him and Peter dug down and attempted to see off a few balls. It was another five overs before Peter found himself bowled by a booming inswinger, out for a stoic 2 off 34 balls – that’s a strike rate of 5.88; a disciplined innings, in recognition of the precarious position that the Plastics found themselves in when he walked to the crease – something that Alex can learn from. Jerry and Matt then enjoyed something of a harum-scarum time together, scoring all of their runs behind square, and muddying the distinction between an edge and a ramp. After ‘maneuvering’ a shot between keeper and slip, Matt took the second opportunity to live and let fly at most balls coming his way, on route to a personal-best 35 runs over three partnerships, as Simon and Jamie watched on. The Plastics crossed the 100 mark during the 26th over, as Simon and Matt continued to impose significant scoreboard pressure – the first ball of the over being dispatched for 4, and the rest of it going for four byes only. This was not to last however as Simon came a cropper the next over (bowled), and Matt followed just 10 balls later, leaving Jamie stranded on his way to what would surely have been a maiden Plastics 50, and leaving the Plastics all out for 127. A loss by 128 runs then – but all was not lost; during their fielding efforts the 11 representatives of Octopus CC regularly pointed out that the plural of octopus was in fact none of the three aforementioned alternatives, but instead ‘octopussies’. Octopussies. We shall be forwarding this information to the Oxford English dictionary posthaste.
0 Comments
Leave a Reply. |
THE TEAMFormed from a collection of players who met on the internet via social cricket at Archbishop's Park, Plastics XI represents the foolhardy members of that group who decided they wanted a bash at proper cricket instead of playing with plastic balls. The team's ability is best described as "weak-weak". Luckily, our social media game is much stronger. Find us on: Archives
October 2021
Categories |